May 10, 2021

Spirituality & Motherhood Episode 10: Tellin my business

Spirituality & Motherhood Episode 10: Tellin my business

In this mini-episode, I offer some intuitive wisdom, a simple ritual for you and the kids, and how different spiritual practices help me work through trauma.

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In this mini-episode, I offer some intuitive wisdom, a simple ritual for you and the kids, and how different spiritual practices help me work through trauma.

I'll be taking a break for the next six weeks. 

However, the next episode will feature the amazing Dr. Ife Afriye Kilimanjaro. Dr. Kilimanjaro is committed to facilitating the deep healing and connection of people,  the planet, and other forms of life, both seen and unseen through her relationships with the Abosom (deities), Nsamanfo (ancestors), Reiki Masters, and plant spirits.  These relationships combined with knowledge of society and social relations, organizational systems and processes, plant medicine, health, and wellness allow her to live up to this divine purpose.

You can learn more about Dr. Kilimanjaro here

I look forward to reconnecting with you soon!

Immense Blessings,




Peace and innumerable blessings and welcome, welcome welcome to the spirituality and motherhood podcast, where we're going to explore different ways of honoring your spiritual path, your spiritual gifts and your divine connection all while being a mother. My intention with this podcast is to support your spiritual path, your spiritual gifts and your divine connection by sharing the wisdom and the experiences of other mothers who are on the path. Just like you. So you know that you are not alone. I come to this podcast as the mother of two boys ages four and seven. Wow. A hoodoo, a root worker, a lay herbalist, um, and a psychic. I also come to you as an entrepreneur. I run a site called simple, weekly ritual where I offer. Good Lord new moon ritual to support you and your kids, you know, enjoying life and riding the wave that is these days. So let's get on  in here, get on any of this, start this episode. So this episode, it's just me, me and my lonesome. Um, for this episode, I'm gonna share some simple ritual.

And then I'm a do a segment called all my business where I'm going to share all my business. And then, um, yeah, I'll share, who's coming up for the next interview. So let's kind of get things moving in here.

Simple Ritual

All right. Let's dig on into this intuitive wisdom and simple ritual.  So the ritual is for you to speak your peace, have yo say every day, whether, you know, whether it's something that you do just by yourself. Or whether it's something you share with your plants or whether it's something you do during your commute, whether it's something you do in the shower, whether it's something you do over some incense, whether you light a candle or whether you wait to somebody is asleep to speak to their highest self and read them the riot act, whatever it is is say what you gotta say, say what's on your heart because it's important.

How you feel is important. What you need to say is important, getting that energy up out of you and directed towards whoever, whatever needs to hear it is a prime directive. It's a matter of self care is a matter of self-respect. It's a matter of personal power and authority to have yo say every day about things that need to get off your chest.

It can be big. It could be small. It could be everything from like, I need you to wipe out the sink because it agitates me that you do not wipe out the sink to like, yo, if you don't pick up all these Legos, I'm going to vacuum them and not feel bad. Have, yo say, have yo say, do not hold back now there's a little bit chaos and drama in the air and like a spirit of agitation.

So as you're having your say, be gentle, be delicate, but it feels important that we women especially get in the habit of having our say because not everybody speaks their piece and we cannot get where we're going collectively if people are not speaking their piece collectively. If mothers are not speaking their piece about what motherhood is to them and the joys and the pains and the pleasures and whatever we cannot get to  where we need to be collectively . If children are not speaking their peace. Everybody needs to get up and speak their peace and  have like their words on the mic. So daily speak your peace. However it needs to happen. Speak your peace. It is more important that you speak your peace, then spare other people's feelings.

Cause you can't really control what other people are going to do anyway. And you can't control what they have going on within them. You can love them, but when things need to get off your chest and be said, they need to be said, so speak your peace. If you need to, um, like again, there's like a spirit of agitation in the air and you know, if you're, you're kind of fearing like drama or you're feeling like beef fearing beef, um, there are some things to kind of mitigate.

You can, if you need to say something, you can wait at night and say whatever you need to say to the higher self of the person be like, Hey, I'm speaking to the highest self of blah-blah-blah. Light a candle light, some incense drink some cool water. Let her rip, you can also put some honey or some Brown sugar.

If you're, if you're vegan under your tongue, something sweet under your tongue and say whatever you got to say, if you have to say, if you're saying it to somebody's face, I am a practitioner of that one. If I have to say something to my partner, and I know it's not going to be fun, I will slip some honey under my tongue and then say what I got to say.

Now. Yeah, there's a whole, like, there's like, I want to give this caveat about like, not being reckless, but I feel like it's more important that people speak up these days because a lot of us have stuff on our chest and it's eating us and it needs to get out. 

Ritual for kids

And in relationship to your kids and like, you know, practice for your kids, it's like encourage your kids to speak their piece, to encourage your kids, to share what they have to say.

And, encourage your kids to share their truth, because it is a matter of personal power, personal authority and self care to be able to vocalize your heart, to be able to vocalize your needs, to be able to vocalize your emotions. Because if you're not sharing your heart, your needs, your emotions, other people can not really connect with you, support you or love you in the ways that you deserve to be loved, or you need to be loved.

So this goes for you. It also goes for the children to make sure your kids are, are, are heard. We should have here your kids, but also support your kids and speak in their piece.

One more thing to say for kids, another practice or another thing, make sure your kids have something, a little something for themselves. We struggle with that around here, but make sure they have a little something that represents what's important to them. According to them who they are and like their values and like support your kids and, and, you know, engaging whatever that something is on the daily.

So your kids can experience themselves, experience their own creativity, experience their own expression and their space of competency and be supported in that. And also when you have something for yourself, when you have like yourself, it's easier to share other things. And it's easier to understand where you start and begin and others start and begin having for yourself as something that's very important for children.

And it doesn't have to be something big. It can be like, okay, you know, we going to divide these Legos in half. And put them in separate boxes. I know that's like, how's that going to happen? Because you know, it's going to mix up girl. It will, it will, we can handle it either way. You're going to have like, you know, you know, a ball, it could be like stacks of paper to draw on or write on or make origami out of.

It could be, it could be paints. It could be, um, an instrument, but whatever it is, it allows your child to express and, and, and kind of live their values in some way. That's a simple ritual. Wow. 

Intuitive Wisdom

Now onto the intuitive wisdom, Lord Jesus. Um, there's like an, like a, like, almost like a pull to go back back to the way things were. And I say, please resist, please resist please. Things will never be what they were, which I think ties into like speaking your peace, the way things were were violent, the way things were were not. If it, even if it was good for you, there were a whole bunch of people around you suffering. So this space we are heading towards is a space where like, There's not a need for everybody to suffer.

And the system isn't busy trying to crush everybody in this space we're heading toward is a system that supports everybody in a harmonious way. So there's no need for, um, us to live in ways that crush others. We can't continue this. Like. I don't care who says, you know, we can go back to normal. Normal does not work.

It never worked, and it's never going to be normal, never again. So instead of going back to normal, which is why it's important to speak your peace right now, recreate you recreate. We are recreating. We're moving towards spaces where we're honoring our own personal power, personal authority,  working with our creative expressions.

However, that looks, it could look from anything like, you know, I grow vegetables very well, to like I make cakes and they are magic to. Um, I write books like, but everybody has their own space where we're all just kind of being in, doing in our own special way of our own in our way that honors our personal authority and our creativity and is our personal power in action.

And it contributes to the wellbeing of a whole. We don't have to crush each other to enjoy life. We don't have to step on each other's necks to enjoy life. That's that's that's on the way out. So. We're not going backwards.   There are all things that we're missing from what was, but we got to move on.

Yeah. What does Stevie say since time knew  to move on on since the beginning, the same as is for us.  It's time to move on. So let's move on. Dear Lord God do not be sucked back into what was instead hunker into your creative expression. And again, creativity is a wide path.

It could be anything. It could be anything. Don't let the word creative throw you off. Not everybody is like painting pictures and reading tarot on Instagram. Not everybody does that. What do you do? Go do that. It's a blessing to your community more than you'll ever know. All right. Let's dig into this next segment where I'm going to tell my business.

Segment: Telling my business

Welcome to this segment where I'm going to tell all my business, my business. Yeah, I haven't sang yet. Okay. Let's let's, let's get into all the business. I'm going to discuss my current spiritual practice, what it looks like and, um, a bit about how my spiritual practices help me work through trauma .

 Um, so let's start by talking about my spiritual practices. I'm not quite sure what I said before. I know I talked about soaps and lotions. Yeah. But like, I guess let's get into the nitty gritty of my spiritual practice. My spiritual practice is very much based on acknowledgement and gratitude. So I light candles and tend altar daily an altar for my helpful ancestors.

Altar for the elements, for my spiritual guides, because I realize like I'm not alone. And I daily also tend to protective spirits and mother earth, I make offerings. So like, that's something that goes on in the daily. I get up early, so I can do that. And , I also make offerings to like local nature spirits.

I head out to the river, I make an offer to the air spirits, to fire. So like, I, I make, um, a habit of just making offerings now sometimes like, you know, the spirits have something to say back to me other than thank you. Like sometimes they're like, you know, um, XYZ, ABC, and sometimes it's like, you know, We see this is on your heart, why aren't you asking us for it?

[00:13:36] Because we really want to help you with it. Like you don't have to do all this stuff by yourself. Just, just ask please, because we want to give this to you, but you need to ask . But it's really interesting to me because this sort of practice has deepened and expanded my connection and the sense of like, whenever I have a need, I know who to go to, to ask.

And sometimes even before, like I'm willing to ask, they come up. And when I have a, an arrangement with, with, with nature spirits, because like I could ki ki  all day with them, but like they only come when I'm alone, because like, if I'm with the kids, I can't hear them. And then they're like, why aren't you listening?

And then it's just not good. And then like, I'm asking the children to hush and the children are like, what is your, what's your problem? So like when I'm out alone and they can send something, they'll be like, Hey, we got you. So for me, gratitude and making offerings has been an amazing way to open up the connection and open up friendly relationships and open up. Um, just to like love outside of the house. Right. And love outside of  you know, humanity. It's really a beautiful experience to be able to go somewhere and like have nature spirits

 you don't normally talk to, you tend to you and be kind to you because at some way, like the land itself recognizes who you are and it wants to love on you. Cause you love on it. So that's the, like the bedroom rock of my current spiritual practice, just lots of offerings, lots of gratitude, burning of incense and candles and saying, thank you.

And I see you and I appreciate you. I love you. Okay. Um, in terms of like working through trauma via spiritual practice, It's been interesting. Cause like I, like, I have trauma around my mama. I mentioned some trauma, I think before in a previous podcast episode, but like I have mama trauma. I do doing a podcast on spirituality and  motherhood, and I got mama trauma.

 So it's been very challenging to be with the children, like to be in mama mode, 24 hours a day because of COVID like nobody's going to school. We're homeschooling. And to have mama trauma, it's been hard because I find myself like I'm already really sensitive and kind of like prone to being triggered with like, what would like the kids here?

It's like, I realized like how sensitive I really am and how there's just like a lot of stuff to sort through and make sure that I'm not passing on. So, um, quite often what happens is a lot of. When I am moving from a space of trigger, being willing to recognize that and like engage in spiritual practice to kind of shift the mood.

So there are certain things, like I make a habit of to make sure that like, energy doesn't compound because if you're in a space and you're yelling a lot, And there's a lot of fighting. There's a lot of tussling. There's a lot of emotional upheaval that energy will attract more emotional upheaval.

It'll attract spirits who get off on that, who feed on that and want more of it. So you'll have just constant, constant chaos, and that kind of feeds into the trauma loop and I'm just constantly triggered. So one of the things I've learned to do is like when I clean the house, I clean with certain herbs to kind of mitigate that. And when things are really, really janky, I whip out some ammonia, some lemon juice and some sea salt. And I scrub when it's really janky. I call upon Archangel Michael, I light some candles and I say, Hey, help, help  clear the energy out so nothing is staying. Cause I grew up in a house where , there was just a lot of emotional explosion, violent, emotional outbursts. So like I got to have peace so I could clean that out. And I, I smudge just like, I'll do the floors. I'll smudge. I call in something sweet.

Okay. That's a part of like maintaining the energetic space for me so that I can be in peace and like. Kind of sort through my brain and not be constantly triggered, but when I am triggered, that's one of the things I do. I'll smudge. I don't have the energy to cleaning the floors every time I'm I'm off, but like, I can, I can reach for some smudge.

I can get some resin put on a charcoal and dance around the apartment. It's not a problem. But one of the things I do to also actively help work through trauma aside from therapy is I stay my tail in a spiritual bath. I have at least one spiritual bath a week. Right now we are up to, three, we're up to three because I'm in a space where I'm trying to work through some, some stuff and it's deep seated and it's habitual and it's, and it's a pattern.

So. Spiritual baths. When I do them three, nine, seven, 21 days in a row, they help work through a pattern. Right? So presently  the spiritual bath dujour, is hyssop rue rosemary lemon with little sea salt and some florida water. To kind of work through some unhelpful patterns and habits.

And I've been working with that for goodness, like six weeks on week six, maybe week seven. Um, I've just like three days in a row. So spiritual baths have been very much how I work and in concert with therapy very much how I work through healing. Um, Trauma. And it feels like it wants like some herbs went to come through.

Okay. So like, other herbs I worked with in the past in terms of working through my like familial trauma have been like lavender, Rosemary, it's kinda calming my inner kid calming.

Soothing, um, also, um, majoram . I also work with herbs in like more of a, like a Western herbalist way too. So I will put arnica and a spiritual bath. I will put Pulsatilla in the spiritual bath, because, you know, in my experience. Those plants have helped me when I've been in those spaces where I needed calming cause of trauma. So, um, yeah, that's been like my main, ritual to go to when, like I know healing is needed. I'll do a spiritual bath.  I stay in a spiritual bath and when things are really bad, when  my mental health is really off and I'm just feeling cruddy and kind of depressed.

One of the things that has helped me is a white bath. So getting some coconut milk, putting some for me, Jasmine, you can put any sort of white flowers, but I, I love Jasmine. Jasmine's always around. I love Jasmine, um, with some perfume. I think you could put florida water in there, but like, I put Jasmine perfume.

Because, I love Jasmine and that's been helpful for helping feed and cleanse my head and kind of move myself from a space that is very, um, triggered to a calmer centered space. The interesting thing about having the kids home for COVID , is that I've learned, also through interviews and just realizing that the kids are very much a healing gift. And that even though I had a certain relationship and experience with my mother, that the kids will have a totally different experience because I'm a different woman. And that like, when I am triggered by behaviors is just an opportunity for healing there.

And just remembering how healing and what a blessing the children are. I have to say one thing about like talking to the women , I've been blessed to talk to , with this podcast is just like, just being constantly reminded of how much a blessing it is, to have children. And that sometimes that blessing is joyful and you're running and you're playing and you're laughing and you're making cookies together or you're outside playing soccer or, you know, you're doing fun stuff.

[00:22:46] And sometimes the blessing is realizing that was the past and I can be in the present and the present will be different and it's going to be okay you know, there's love here now and all as well.

[00:23:02] Yeah. It's been interesting having trauma around motherhood and sometimes explaining things to children.  Why certain things are the way they are like, you know, why, you know, why aren't we seeing grandma? Why aren't we doing this? Why don't we do that? I was like, well, let me tell you the kiddie version and then you'll get older and then you'll be able to make it your own decision, you know?

[00:23:25] And I'll tell you the adult version, you can decide what you want to do, because you'll be old enough to  be more aware and more cognizant of what's going on. So yes. That's that is that all that needs to be said about that. Yeah, but I have to say like having , a connection with plants is very much facilitated healing trauma during motherhood, because the plants are very much save me.

[00:23:51] There've been days I've walked out the door and  names will come to my head. Like you need to look this up and then I'll look it up. And I'm like, Oh, okay. So like there's a flower essence that does this. Oh. And I could just find that, Oh, the flower essence made in Scotland. Finland.

Okay. I'm a, I'm a, I'm a cop that it's in the budget or oh, this herb is, Oh, it's available here. It's perfect for a spiritual bath. Let me just go to the store and see if I can find it.  I didn't think when I studied herbalism during my days in Portland, that it would feed into my own sort of emotional healing and the healing of ancestral lineage, because we are all ancestry in progress, but it has, and it does.

Yeah. That's all that needs to be said about that. Let's let's go on into closing. We're going to close this out.

In closing

That's it, that's it, it's a short one. It's a certain way because it's just me telling my business. But thank you for listening to my business. Thank you for being here. Thank you for rolling with me, sharing your space, your time and energy. Hey, so look, I'll be back in six weeks with an interview of Dr.

 Ife Kilimanjaro, which will be really, really exciting just to let you know a little bit about  Dr. Kilimanjaro.  She has been called and chosen to walk the path of Okomfo or spiritual healer, in the Ghanaian , Ashanti tradition. She's a Reiki master. Herbalist. And she's committed to facilitating the deep healing and connection of people, the planet, and other life forms both seen and unseen.

And she does this through the  strength of her relationships with , the deities with ancestors, Reiki masters, and plant spirits combined with the knowledge of society, societal relationships , organizational systems and processes, plant medicine, health and wellness. Through all that  knowledge and connection, she's able to live up to her divine purpose and, and, and Doctor Kilimanjaro has done a lot.

She's worked as a climate and environmental justice warrior as an advocate, connector and synthesizer, a facilitator, educator, spiritual activist and a healing supporter. So,  I'm really, really looking forward to this interview and sharing it with you.

I pray, I pray. I pray to be reconnected with you again in six weeks. So until then stay blessed and I look forward to connecting with you again soon. Peace.